The Sounds of Silence

They call it writer's block.  I call it the sounds of silence!  There is nothing blocking my characters from talking. They are refusing to talk!  Purposefully, blatantly, stubbornly!  They sit in the back of my brain, straining my neck with their protest, their torturing, their withholding!  They stare at me, with accusing eyes, wrinkled brows and pouting mouths!  This is the way they take their power, control my fingers, reign in my journey down wrong paths.  This is their way of saying - NO!  That is not what I want to do, not what I want to say, NOT WHO I AM!  Take another look, Vanessa.  Listen.  Think.  Listen. LISTEN!  We are in a tug of war.  This new play "Bar Codes" is at a stand still.  My schedule is not the schedule of the characters waiting to brought to full life.  They do not like their becoming, as I am writing it.  They demand a new unfolding. And so they sit in their silence - holding me hostage until I give in.   I hold onto the words that I have written. How can I let go?  And so we sit at this cross road - neither side will to give in.  They know that I know that it will be me that gives in.  Will delete.  Will re-write.  Will morn the loss of my beginnings. And, eventually, will celebrate what is re-born.